


The Breath of Life is Short

by SusanShining



Series: One-shots [2]
Category: Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure (Cartoon)
Genre: Asthma, Baby Death, Baby Varian (Disney), Character Death, Gen, How Do I Tag, I Made Myself Cry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:46:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27352933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SusanShining/pseuds/SusanShining
Summary: Varian always had trouble breathing. It was only a matter of time until he eventually stopped but... his parents never thought it would be so soon.
Relationships: Quirin/Ulla (Disney: Varian and the Seven Kingdoms), Quirin/Varian (Disney)
Series: One-shots [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1997542
Comments: 7
Kudos: 28





	The Breath of Life is Short

**Author's Note:**

> I cried while writing this, so feel free to scream at me however much you want, I’m suffering along with you.  
> But this is really Saad’s fault so…

“Do… you think he’s going to get better?” Ulla asked shakily. The three adults peered through the doorway where the toddler's harsh fits of coughing sounded almost without end. Varian had been born with some trouble breathing, sure, but… it was never as bad as  _ this. _

“It all depends on how bad the illness is, which… we still haven’t found out what is causing it…” the woman told her, clipboard trembling in her hand. “I- I’m so sorry Ulla I- I don’t know how-”

“We know,” Quirin told her gently, giving the medic a small smile. “But... is there anything you can do?”

“I… suppose we could do a  tracheostomy again- but we’ve been running out of painkillers and-” frustrated tears pricked her eyes and she brought a hand up to her face, pinching the bridge of her nose. “I- I don’t think that any of us wants to use that.”

Quirin’s face fell and he let out a small sigh. “It’s okay  Josephine, we know you’ve done all you could,” he looked away, not meeting her eyes. “But… I think it’s time for you to go. Tell Mason we said hi.”

Josephine nodded, but cast one look at Ulla and reached out to embrace her friend, but the mother only pulled away, silently stepping over to the side of her son’s bed. Josephine winced as Varian’s coughing grew harsher and nodded, looking down shamefully as she left the house.

Quirin stared after the medic for a moment before following his wife into the room. It was a somewhat large area, the walls painted a light blue color and his heart ached to remember when the three of them had done it. His mother was forced to help their son paint, as Varian could barely hold the brush, but he had still wailed when it was taken from him. 

He had been breathing better that day, but Quirin could still remember wincing every time his child had sucked in a hoarse wheeze of air. Ulla had told him that it might be nice for Varian to have some fun when he had expressed his concerns, and they had returned to their painting, them finishing a bit after sunset.

Varian had spent the night in their room then, the paint still needing to dry. Sleeping always came hard for them all, the parents not wanting to close their eyes of fear that Varian’s breath might be his last.

And now, that very much might be the case.

“Varian… sweety can you open your eyes for mommy?” Ulla asked from her place at the bed, pulling the trembling child into her arms. Varian didn’t answer, but his eyes did peek open, small tears filling up in them.

“Mamma…” he mumbled out but was interrupted by yet another wave of coughing. Immediately Ulla’s composure fell, her letting out a small sob and gripping him tight against her. “It-” another cough. “It  _ hurts.” _

“I… I know baby… but only for a little bit, okay? Then- then you can go to sleep, yeah? Would- Wouldn’t you like that?” she asked the child when Quirin settled down next to them on the bed, the family holding each other tightly as their son suffered from the illness that had plagued his life for the past five and a half years.

There had always been this invisible noose hung around Varian’s throat, it tightening and being loosened at random intervals throughout the year. There had always been times when the wheezing wouldn’t be as strong or apparent, times when Varian could go outside and play with Sophia and the other kids. And then there were the times such as these, where the child could barely breathe, and he couldn’t help but beg to the universe every time that it wouldn’t take their son away from him, that he would live just a little longer before they had to place him down into the earth. That they would never have to see the small form disappear under the earth.

“Don’t… want to sleep yet…” Varian, at last, murmured when the fits had subsided. “Want- want to say- say good- goodnight to Jessica…”

“Jessica huh?” a watery laugh escaped Quirin’s mouth. “I thought Sophia was your queen now?”

“No…” the toddler shook his head weakly. “S-” another cough.” “S-Sophie didn't like the- the crown anymore- so- so she can’t- she can’t be the q-queen…” he whimpered as a wave of cold washed over him and Ulla, in turn, pulled the small white blanket over him. 

Varian smiled slightly until he went into another round of hacking past the constant buildup in his airway. His chest heaved up and down as he fought against it all to take one more breath inside- just one more after one more-

“Shh…” Ulla hushed him gently when Varian opened his mouth to speak again. “It’s okay, you don’t need to talk, just- just focus on breathing for us alright?” she told him, but the child only shook his head furiously.

“B-but how else will you learn when I- I’m gone?” he asked them quietly, wheezing in and out harshly, but his words somehow found a way through. “B-Beth says that they- they doesn't want m-me to- to go, but- but this time I- I have to... R-right mamma?”

“No!” Ulla cried, pulling away from Varian and holding her son’s shoulders. “No- no you don’t have to go at all!” her eyes searched the room, looking for something-  _ anything _ \- to save her little boy, but… there was nothing. 

“Just- you can keep breathing right? Just keep doing that until I can get you a glass of water- alright baby?” she told him, lifting Varian hurriedly into Quirin’s arms and standing up, but her husband reached out to her before she could leave. He didn’t say anything, just meeting her tear-filled eyes with his own before an understanding look passed between them and she allowed him to pull her back down into their embrace.

After a while in the silence, Varian’s coughing finally stopped and he pressed himself deeper into his father’s chest, snuggling in as he had done so many times before. It was… warm there, it always was and he felt his eyes start to drift closed, but… he couldn’t sleep yet. Not when mamma and daddy were still crying softly above him.

“Are- are you gonna be o-okay?” he whispered out faintly, “I- I’m not gonna be there to- to make my bed anymore… would you do it for me?”

Quirin’s vision blurred, but he managed a small nod and plastered a wet smile on his face. “Yeah… anything for you kiddo.”

Varian smiled, exhaling slightly through his nose. “Good… Mr. Bandit needs to sleep too…” his eyelids grew heavy as he took in another breath of air. “‘Night mamma, daddy, love you…” and with that, his eyes closed and he exhaled once more.

He would never breathe in again.

\---------

The next two days were almost a blur to the parents. Friends and neighbors coming over to offer up their condolences. The hardest time was when Varian’s young friends came over to see Varian, their parents having to explain to some of the younger children why their friend couldn’t play today.

Some of the older ones weren’t even told of what had happened, but they had still brought white lilies to lay next to their son’s peaceful form. When asked how they knew from Ulla, they went quiet for a bit, eyes hardly leaving their friend.

“We just… knew,” Nathan said quietly, gripping the hand of his sister, Beth, as she sobbed next to him. 

“He… He always liked lilies.” Sophie told them, but once her voice cut off, Max continued for her, fidgeting with a pair of black gloves. 

“I wonder if he’ll use these to make another crown. For himself this time, he deserves to be prince today.” the boy paused, “He always was a prince anyway.”

The children had left not long after that, and Quirin later saw them sitting under the small apple tree in their backyard, speaking with each other solemnly. It was quite a large gathering of children, sitting in a circle as they took turns speaking. Others would chime in briefly from time to time, but otherwise, they were mostly silent.

The burial was brief and quiet. It took place on a small cliffside overlooking the ocean. It was a beautiful view, and multiple people attended. Varian’s friends, his doctors, even other townsfolk that barely knew them, but admitted that the boy had never failed to brighten up their day.

The tombstone was already ready for him, Quirin had told himself that it was just in case, that it wouldn’t be needed for some time yet until Varian was older, hopefully much older than just a child. He wanted to ensure that Varian left his mark on the world when he eventually passed, but he supposed that deep down he knew that Varian wouldn’t live that long.

He wasn’t going to lie, it hurt to fill the hole in with dirt, leaving his child’s body in a small coffin under the earth. It hurt that he had to see his wife shut down and head home before it was over. It hurt that he wasn’t able to leave the grave long after it had turned dark. Varian always made sure he would sleep when he was exhausted from working out in the field all day. If his daddy was still awake after the sun had set, no matter what they were doing, the boy would drop everything they were doing, nab Quirin’s large hand with his tiny one, and pull the man into bed whether Quirin liked it or not.

The father stayed on the cliffside for a long time, thinking back on the memories and wondering whatever he did to deserve such a wonderful child. But at the same time, he wondered why the world would take his boy away.

Perhaps that’s what made Varian so special. He was going to die eventually, and the boy had known that. He had proved as much in his last moments. Perhaps the reason why his child was wonderful was that he knew that he was dying. He knew that he would eventually leave, so the child had done his best to make his short life worth it.

And as Quirin stared out at the sparkling waves, when he could almost  _ see  _ his son playing in them, no breathing troubles holding him back as he danced in the sky, he couldn’t agree more.


End file.
